Sleep Master

This idea has been plaguing me, now that i have a newborn.  WHY oh why, in the infinite ideas and consumerism directed at new parents, low on sleep, half-insane trying to figure out how to get their little ones to nap, to sleep through the night, in desperation putting them into their cars and driving around aimlessly for hours... why isn't there some kind of indoor contraption that you can put a car seat on and will rumble like a car for as long as is needed?  who are the idiots in charge of baby products?  Someone make a billion here.

Of course, no one will do it because of the risks involved in new baby-specific products.  We are so primitive when it comes to infant care.  I know it's because no one wants to be the first to try any new product what could accidentally kill a child.  But come on, future!  There's got to be a way.

Why isn't there a baby bed that mimics the womb?  Why do we make these little tiny naked people go from the warmth and darkness of a mother's body right into the light of day and a crib?  Maybe the bed would have a top.  Maybe it would move like a car, and rock, and bounce.  Maybe it would have sound options, like vacuum cleaner, and heartbeat, and oceans. The most progressive thing I could find on the internet looked like the photo above.  And that's more ancient than modern, and still much less than what i'm talking about.

Here is a summary of my requirements:

1. A contraption not much bigger than a carseat, that rumbles and bops and mhrrs just like a car would.  Have several settings for different kinds of cars: truck, sedan, hybrid.  Allow the pace to be brought higher and lower, so that ideally, the child can be phased out of this need by the parent setting the speed lower each night, until sleep can occur with it off.
2. Make it have a capsule-type (think: Womb) option.
3. A luxury feature could be an accompanying seat that can gradually fold down from a car-seat interior to a flat interior, in increments set by the user.  This would allow a child to make the transition from sitting to flat sleeping, if it was an issue.
4. Make it adaptable to a carseat base.

I can hear the naysayers exclaiming about how this would allow parents to keep their child in the same apparatus all day, without reason for picking it up, if only to transfer it from apparatus to apparatus.  I think the inherent fear and ignorance of human instincts is apparent, just in stating the opposing view.  I welcome more challenges.

For some reason I had WS: Western Sanctuaries as the title here.  Not sure why, can't find anything on the web on it...